Illusion

Today I died.

I'm not quite sure what happened, because first of all, everything passed by in a swift, hazy blur, and second, when you realize that you're dead, certain things do not quite matter as much as they did when you were still alive.

However, I do recall a few things, like the blind old man solemnly playing his guitar on the other side of the street. A sharp strike of pain. It was a hot day, and I was riding to somewhere along with a number of people.

I never expected it to happen. One moment I was just sitting, and the next thing I knew, I felt like my body was flying out of the vehicle. I blacked out for a few moments because of the impact with the gravel, but at least (and quite unnaturally) there was no pain.

When I came to, a strange setting greeted me. I was lying on the ground a few meters off a jeepney that people were fussing about. I examined myself, twitched my toes, and found no broken bones or even a single scratch. I concluded, too, that it was probably the reason why nobody was attending to me.

I stood up and dusted myself off. That day I wore my jeans and a shirt my friend bought for me from Vigan. It was a white shirt and I found it odd that it was clean all over.

'Hello.'

I turned around to see a smiling young man, walking towards me. He seemed very familiar.

I replied back a greeting and asked him if he could tell me what was happening.

'Two people just died.'

I expressed a bit of surprise and muttered a few words of remorse. After all, it's never proper to take death lightly--even if it is a stranger's.

'Follow me.' He said. I looked at him as he reached out his hand towards me. In normal cases, strangers holding our their hands to me (no matter how familiar they look) and telling me afterwards to follow them would seem utterly preposterous. But I guess this was different. Everything seemed so strange, suddenly, that holding his hand was a very welcome thought. The day that started out as a routine took a wonderfully promising turn for the better.

So I took his hand. But still I wondered about what happened to the people who died. I peered about through the crowd--over shoulders and under limbs--to see a body wearing a white shirt and a pair of jeans sprawled over the jeepney seats and soaked with blood.

He tugged me away and said a little condescendingly that there are some things I don't need to see.

We walked.

Through the city, through the night, through the fields and forests and whatnot--never stopping for anything. We didn't eat, but apparently there was no need to. And for a while I felt a little inhuman to be able to walk for hundreds of miles and yet feeling like I haven't walked a single step. But once in a while, we'll stop and sit and talk for a while, and he smiles and I feel a bit more human again.

He said his name was Sid, and that he's going to take me somewhere nice, and that we'll get there after a few more days of walking.

We got up and walked and walked and walked... until we reached the end of the trail where we saw a spire twisting towards the heavens. Then he asked me,

'What's the one thing you have always wanted to do all your life?'

I thought for a moment. I set aside all restrictions, reasons, and practicality that used to hover about my head. I told him that I wanted to draw. And I made it extra clear that I didn't want to draft. Just draw anything I pleased and wanted to share.

I looked at him and saw that he was smiling.

'That's beautiful.' Were the whispered words.

He began to laugh, and I found myself laughing, too.

Then we reached the gates leading to the tower. He heaved a contented sigh and told me
'We're here. Welcome home.'

Home?

'Yes, home.' He was happy for me and it was contagious--I began feeling happy for myself.

So, now that I'm home, I ask, what do I do next?

'Nothing. You'll just draw when you feel like it. By the way, do you know what happens to your drawings?'

I shake my head.

'They appear in people's dreams.'

I thought that it didn't sound so bad and I told him so.

'(Laugh) You'll meet God in a while.'

Meet God?..Am I...dead?

'Oh no, no. You're not dead...not at all. This is only the first day of your life...